What Happens In Mordor...

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We were prepared to enjoy the heart of Mayfair, described as quite simply the ultimate night out in London! Embassy was supposed to be our destination but it wasn't meant to happen and instead this story takes place in the context of historical events in 'Middle-earth'.

Not unlike how the novel begins with Frodo Baggins inheriting the Ring from Bilbo, we went straight for the Gin. Both of us were unaware of its origins but we travelled from the Shire home through the Old Forest ASDA car park, and after passing the Barrow-downs trolleys we stopped for a night in the town of Bree Bexleyheath! It was like destiny had entwined our paths with this journey through Middle-earth! We were to be joined here by someone that would act as guide and protector and I believe we found him as we made our way towards the bar. I thought the night went well although according to the Lord of the Rings we narrowly escaped being attacked by the Ringwraiths. The Ringwraiths didn't attack so I can only presume that the guide and protector served his purpose at this point of the night!

Unlike the hobbits we travelled to another venue and carried on the evening, I was most impressed with the events that transpired. The Council of Elrond revealed some significant history but we weren't in any condition to react accordingly, instead we choose to participate in a karaoke session! This must have offended the Council because they decided that the threat of Sauron is too great and that the best course of action is to destroy the Ring! I felt this was a complete overreaction to be honest! The Fellowship was comprised of nine members, there were two of us remaining as the night concluded. The following conversation was the defining chapter -

"Where are you..."

"Outside the Job Centre eating Chinese!"

"No... Where are you..."

"Outside the Job Centre eating Chinese!"

"Seriously, where are you..."

"Outside the Job Centre eating Chinese!"

"Where are you Joe..."

To be continued......